I can’t stand the silence

(Shut it, Crisitunity.)

I feel like I’ve been a non-contributing lump lately.  But my workouts have been hella boring.

I have gotten some good reading done, though.  Although I had to start bringing in a ruler to hold my book open on the little tabs on the cross-trainer.

Typical five-minute stretch, say 20 minutes into the workout:

  • TB:  Flips page, grabs towel, wipes sweat off bald head and face
  • Book:  Left side page flops out, perpendicular to my line of sight
  • TB:  Adjusts book
  • iPod:  New song starts, volume very quiet
  • TB:  Adjusts volume
  • Book:  Right side flops out
  • TB:  Adjusts book, loses stride
  • iPod:  Falls out of the cupholder, left earphone pops out, it’s hanging by my right ear
  • TB:  carefully pulls iPod up through the slot in the cupholder by the cord
  • Book:  Right side flops out
  • TB:  Loses a step on crosstrainer, almost falls off, adjusts book, grabs towel, wipes sweat
  • Book:  Right side flops out
  • TB:  Curses, adjusts book
  • Book:  Left side flops out
  • TB:  Resists urge to throw book across room, adjusts book
  • iPod:  New song starts, volume way high, blows eardrums out
  • TB:  Adjusts volume, grabs towel, wipes sweat, turns page
  • Book:  flips TB the bird

I might have hallucinated that last one.  But I’m not betting on it.


8 Responses to I can’t stand the silence

  1. crisitunity says:

    THIS IS WHY I DO NOT DO THE GYM. THIS EXACT PRECISE THING. I nodded so hard at this post that my head may or may not have come clean off.

  2. Kimmothy says:

    It takes extreme coordination to pull off the exercising-listening to music-reading trick, way more coordination than I’ve ever had. I admire your brave attempt.

    • Taoist Biker says:

      Usually, the more things I’m doing at once, the happier I am. Hence my multiple-windows-open syndrome at work, etc.

      I actually had a girlfriend break up with me in high school at least partially for that reason (or at least so I was later told); she was peeved that she didn’t have my total attention: when we talked on the phone for an hour a night, I was also reading a comic book and playing my guitar at the same time.

  3. Shari says:

    How bout listening to the audio book, that way you have something for your brain to focus on besides sucking air and you don’t have to worry about those cursed pages.

  4. Laura says:

    Maybe an arm band for your iPod?

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