Whatever Helps the Cause

So I’ve learned some lessons during this whole weight loss journey. One of them, a biggie, is when I’m all hyped up and excited about hopping back on the wagon, DON’T make too big of a deal of it. Last summer when we all joined forces and formed this blog, I was so happy. I was slowly but steadily losing weight and loved nothing more than discussing the subject with you guys and whoever else who would listen. Six weeks later things were chugging right along and I wrote a post about being nervous to break my routine to go on vacation. Then I went on vacation. DundunDUNNN…fucked.

I felt like such a failure and more than that, a fool. How many people (besides myself) did I disappoint? Probably nobody, but that’s not how it felt. I was embarrassed. I had thought making my goals public would shame me into staying the course. Ha! Well, we all saw how that turned out. Then when I was finally ready to start over, I was almost scared to come back here and admit it to anyone. Luckily for me you guys are all awesome and supportive and I feel like an idiot. In a good way.

Anyway, as good as it is to be back here, I’ve been even more careful in real life. Besides Brian, whom I live with and who notices when I stop doing things like asking for chocolate whenever he stops at a convenience store, I tried to keep it all on the DL, especially at work. I’m not what you’d call close to my co-workers, but we are friendly and make the daily small talk (they do way, way, WAY more than me, as in Please. Stop. Talking – my God).

The two women who have offices right next to mine are who I’m talking about specifically. They’re very nice, but to call them over-sharers is a gross understatement. Every day I’m treated to an almost endless stream of the minutae of every aspect of their lives. They get along with each other very well as you can imagine, but I’ve backed off to the point of being politely acknowledging and that’s about all I can handle.

I have a point, I promise – Jesus, I’m starting to sound like them.

So the other day I was eating lunch in my office – a salad. This is not unusual for me anyway, but for some reason as they were leaving to go out for lunch, they stopped in my doorway and started tag-teaming me.
“Ooh, that looks good!”
“What are you doing, eating a salad?” (Uhhh…)
“Are you on a diet?”
“You do look like you’ve lost weight!”
“Blahblahblahblah”

I was wearing pants one size down from what’s been the norm lately, which I was pretty damn excited about, so in a moment of pure weakness I admitted yes, I was “working on losing some weight.” Low-key. No big deal. Sure.

It takes way less than that for them to latch on and run with something, so they immediately started talking about it – since we’re all trying to lose weight why not turn it into something fun we can do together – a Biggest Loser type contest! We can send out an email to the other women, see if anyone else wants to participate and then at the end of three or six or however many months, whoever loses the most percentage of weight wins a prize! Weekly weigh-ins, the works.

Then, and I’m not even joking, they went out to Burger King.

You’d think my feelings for them along with my trying to keep the weight watching bidness to myself would cause me to immediately back out, right? Well, I thought so at first too. I’m not a joiner, certainly not when it comes to these people, and it just makes more sense to keep on truckin’ solo. Except the more I thought about it, the more I figured this might become a real source of amusement for me. A little friendly competition never hurt, right? And it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been motivated out of just purely wanting to shut someone up.

The contest starts this Monday. Today they asked if I wanted to go with them to the Old Fashioned Sandwich Shoppe for cheese fries and milkshakes because they wanted to “celebrate” while there’s still time. I politely declined and went back to my tuna on rye. Which they made fun of. And then upon returning went into great detail about how awesome the food was, still slurping their shakes and simultaneously griping about how full they were.

I think this is going to be fun.

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6 Responses to Whatever Helps the Cause

  1. crisitunity says:

    I feel the same way about getting excited about a topic and then having it blow up in my face. It’s very difficult to return and talk about it again, knowing that you slinked away the last time. I thought I’d learned my lesson about that with writing, because every time I turned my head I had to tell someone in BF’s family that I hadn’t written anything in a while but thanks for asking, but I think it’s a lesson that people who get genuinely excited about life (which is a great quality!) never learn all the way. Oh well.

    I have a suspicion that your co-workers won’t shut up when you lose weight and they don’t. My own co-talker, here, is CONSTANTLY making remarks about how fat she is and how it’s her own fault since she eats so much all day and you’re so good to stay so thin and what a healthy lunch you’ve got there and on and on and on. She’s jolly and cheerful about it all, so it’s less awkward than it could be if she was a total down-on-herself Gloomy Gus, but AAAAGH.

    • Kimmothy says:

      “Co-talker” – oh, that is too good.
      I have little patience with people (including myself) who bitch and moan about things they’re capable of changing yet don’t do anything to change it. We’re all human and do it to a certain degree, but after awhile it’s just white noise to me.

  2. crisitunity says:

    I forgot to say, duh, that it’s good to see you back here anyway! You’re always welcome and you know it, no matter how many intervening desserts you’ve had. That goes for anyone else reading.

  3. Tiffany says:

    Dude, you are SO going to kick their asses.

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